It’s Tuesday morning. You’re sitting in your car on your morning commute and there’s an accident up ahead. You’re going to be late for work. You consider alternate routes, but the first exit is a long way off and anyway, all the roads are slow this time of the morning. You’re frustrated. The more you think about it, the angrier you get. Your heart starts racing…
Being stuck in traffic is a common enough predicament, and like many situations, there are different ways of interpreting and responding to it. Here’s an important idea that at first seems self-evident but helps a lot:
Some things you can control, others you can’t.
It’s a key idea in stoic philosophy, which is the ideological root of modern day cognitive behavioral therapy (and if it sounds like the beginning of the serenity prayer to you, that’s no coincidence either). Epictetus, one of the better known teachers of this school, has this to say about trying to control what’s out of your hands:
If you think you have free reign over things that are naturally beyond your control, or if you attempt to adopt the affairs of others as your own, your pursuits will be thwarted and you will become a frustrated, anxious, and fault-finding person.
So how about another way of looking at it?
What if this is a forced break? A mandatory 45 minute vacation? Sure, you can think of places you’d rather spend your vacation, but the point is, this time in your car is yours and no one else’s. It’s your time to enjoy.
All you have to do is take it.
Source of Epictetus quote: The Art of Living.
